Be Kind or Be Nice?

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Some words come to mind when we're looking at being kind; words like “considerate”, “generous”, and “helpful”. How about being nice? Words like “agreeable”, “pleasant”, and “enjoyable”.

Now, are there situations where kindness is preferred to niceness? And are these situations more and so should kindness dominate our experiences more? This is an area I'm researching because I believe kindness can make our lives more meaningful.

But I also believe there's a tendency to confuse kindness with niceness. And maybe that's why we don't see as many actions demonstrating kindness as they should.

There's a story I heard that intrigued me. Here goes the story. It's about a lady called Pat. And some tellers called Kim, Roger, and Shane. Now Pat was in a queue to be attended to in a service area. Pat preferred Kim to attend to her because she'd known her for a while. She's more comfortable around her. So, when it was Pat’s turn to move to the next available teller, which happened to be Roger. She stays in the queue and asks the next in line to go as she wants to wait for Kim. The customer Kim was attending to took so long so Pat ended up waiting for 25 minutes while Roger and Shane in that time had both waited on 8 different customers. Now, was Pat being fair to herself by waiting? Was she fair to the organization she was working for? Was she fair to her colleagues?

We tell our little ones to take turns. Why? Because we believe it's helpful. Helpful to them as they learn orderliness. Moreover, it’s a civil thing to do. Helpful to their playmates in the queue, as it demonstrates respect for their time. That is being fair.

So, back to Pat’s story. I believe Pat wanted to be served to her liking which is not a bad thing in itself. But when considered from the lens of other people in that service area, can we say Pat wanted to have a nice time as opposed to being kind. You see the difference?

 I would like to summarize by saying the one who wants to be served to his or her liking is merely wanting to have a nice time. It is the one who takes turns with consideration for others while being served that is being kind. That's something for us to think about.

Until the next episode, "Let's continue to learn together. And be encouraged to keep on connecting".

Cheerio!

 

This blog is about personal development based on the principles of fairness, compassion, and commitment. This includes the practice of 'speaking' positive affirmations, which can be a powerful tool to support self-development. Hopefully, you’re impacted positively in some ways. As we all know, personal circumstances are quite different. So, I encourage you to apply the lessons in line with your own context. Do continue to “Hola” to connect with people and remember “Let's continue to learn together and be encouraged to keep on connecting”.